So it I've let life get in my way...again. Not a new theme for me. Oddly enough, though, I think I see the lesson this time rather than wonder at it. After all I've been saying for a couple months now "I'm not going to worry, it will all be taken care of"...now I'm getting to prove the fact.
I was set to have my cake and eat it, too. My manager left the company I'm working for and I was poised to finally be hired and get a substantial raise, to finally be able to quit my part time job of nearly 3 years, and to finally look into making a dent into my debt....I was flying high....and then the bottom fell out. Not only did I discover that I'm not being hired, but they are actually letting me go at the end of the month. I'm a contractor/temp even though I've worked full time for over a year, but as such that means no severance, nothing for all the hard work I've put in. The day I leave here is the day I leave a steady paycheck. Then I found out that the benefits I've had through my part time job would probably go away because no one has the hours to sustain me right now. So I'll be losing my job, my health insurance and any vacation pay I could have gotten.
I admit I sobbed when I found out, then I got really angry, then numb (your basic mourning process) and then a little voice spoke up and said "Isn't it you who has been saying you trust that it will all work out?" and I suddenly realized I wasn't doing that so I decided to just let it go and let it all work itself out. That doesn't mean I'm not going to go out there and work at finding another job, but I've found peace in the knowledge that God will take me to whatever path I'm supposed to go down. It will all work out.
